To Agatha, With Love

My new chapter in the Wild Woman's Book of Alchemy

For the past few years, I have been communicating with one of the OG rebels in the writing world. She’s sassy and blunt while also being kind and compassionate. She’s full of tough love and will call me on my bullshit like no one else can. She’s full of wisdom and clarity and I trust her implicitly.

The only catch? She’s dead.

Yes, the person I’m working with has been gone from this earthly plane for nearly fifty years.

But I can hear her as if she’s standing in the room with me.

Every writer has a guiding force—a muse, a mentor, or perhaps a spirit guide—who shapes their creative process. For me, that guide is none other than the Queen of Crime herself, Agatha Christie.

“BULLSHIT!” I can hear from some keyboard warrior in the back. Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret…

Writing spirit guides (or ANY spirit guide) is less about séances and crystal balls and more about drawing inspiration from someone whose words and approach to storytelling resonate deeply with you. It’s about connecting with the essence and the vitality of the person who was once alive. And you don’t have to be “special” or “spiritual” or “woo” or “gifted” to be able to do it. Anyone can have a spirit guide. And any writer can have a writing spirit guide.

While communicating with a writing spirit guide can be a spiritual experience, more often than not, it’s fairly mundane, boring, and exactly what you would expect if you were communicating with another writer friend.

Although I’ve written about Agatha before (here), I’ve not really done an in-depth essay about her. I have to admit that I didn’t want people to think I’m crazy.

Then I was invited to contribute a chapter to a book with women who did NOT think I was crazy. Who were insanely interested in this relationship and wanted to know more.

And it filled me with a deep knowing that Agatha herself validated.

This is real and I owe it to other writers to “normalize” this kind of relationship.

To structure this essay, I thought it would be fun to answer questions I’ve received over the years about working with Agatha. These have been accumulated through my community, workshops I’ve taught, writer’s groups I’ve facilitated, etc.

“When you say that you talk to Agatha, do you mean literally? Figuratively? In your head?”

All of the above! The beautiful thing about writing spirit guides is that they are always listening and unlike with people’ing in real life — they actually understand what you’re trying to say or ask without you having to be so damn explicit all the time. But for those of you want a more concrete answer:

The way I communicate with Agatha best IS through writing. Usually Automatic Writing or a back and forth dialogue using tarot or oracle cards.

“Do you believe you’re actually communicating with Agatha Christie, or is this more symbolic?”

I believe that it’s actually Agatha, but of course, I can’t prove that. Although what I can say is that in some of my communications with her, she has responded with eerie accuracy and knowledge of her “earthly” self.

For example, when I was first beginning to communicate with her, I felt as if I needed that “proof” for myself. So I began to ask her about her life. And when I compared her answers with her biographies or facts, they matched up perfectly.

Honestly, though, at the end of the day whether or not it’s really Agatha no longer bothers me because again, it’s less about the woo-woo side of our relationship and more about me being able to sense the presence of something bigger than me. Something that knows things I do not.

“Why Agatha Christie? Why not another author?”

This is actually a funny story I tell in my chapter for The Wild Woman’s Book of Alchemy. When I first set out to meet my writing spirit guide, I thought I knew who it was going to be. And Agatha was NOT that person. In fact, while I’ve always loved Agatha Christie as an author and enjoy her books, I wouldn’t say that she held any major importance to me until I found out she was my writing spirit guide.

Here’s another thing about writing spirit guides though — there’s often two ways you can work them. One is the ever-evolving-shifting relationship like I have with Agatha. But there’s also a way of “invoking” a spirit guide. This means that you’re intentionally calling upon a spirit guide to help you because you believe they embody the knowledge and wisdom you want to find. I often use Maya Angelou as an “invoked” spirit guide because I find her to be a deep inspiration to me. So while she doesn’t step into my life the way Agatha does, I do believe she offers me the energy of what she represents so often: courage, determination, sovereignty.

“How does Agatha Christie help you when you’re stuck?”

I don’t only go to Agatha when I’m stuck — that’s an important distinction. The dead are a lot like the living in a way — it’s not very nice to go to someone and expect them to give, give, give without offering them something in return. My relationship with Agatha has been built on more than just her help. It’s been developed through gentle questioning of both of our beliefs, values, and hardships in life. It’s been through giving her glimpses of my messy, vulnerable self and offering up my doubts and concerns that has allowed her to see where I need her help the most.

But when I am stuck, I head to my journal and begin to communicate with her. There’s no “secret sauce” or “special magic” I use — I simply sit down and begin to write to Agatha with her in mind. I often will explain to her what I’m stuck on and ask for her advice. Then I either continue in the automatic writing session with her answer OR I begin to pull cards to get a deeper and more nuanced response.

“Do you use Agatha Christie’s techniques consciously, or does her influence appear naturally in your writing?”

I have learned so much from Agatha’s novels (as well as from her in general). I even developed an “The Unofficial Christie Guide to Writing” because there are so many ways we can learn writing from Agatha.

That being said, my writing has always been and will always be much different than Agatha’s. I write in genres parallel to hers, but more often than not, my books and writing have nothing in common with Agatha’s books or her writing. And that’s okay! Preferable actually. I don’t think I would enjoy working with a guide that I feel has so much influence over my writing — and almost all of our conversations are less about the actual writing than it is the peripheral parts of writing.

I would go so far as to say that what I’ve learned from Agatha’s writing and her books is the same as how I would study any author — living or alive.

“Do you ever disagree with your spirit guide?”

Hell yes! There have been times when working with Agatha, where I very adamantly disagree with the response she’s given me. This is where the skill of discernment comes into play. Because just like a writing workshop, or being in a class where your work is being dissected and commented on from others — it’s up to YOU as the writer to take what works and leave the rest. It’s up to YOU as a writer to discern whether the advice, suggestion or comment works for you. The same is true with your guide.

HOWEVER. More often than not — Agatha is like my mother — right in hindsight.

There have been very few times where following her lead or her responses to me hasn’t resulted in achieving what I wanted. When I try to ignore or avoid or directly go against her, it usually ends poorly.

But even dead people are wrong sometimes.

“How do you “receive” guidance from your spirit guide? Is it a mental exercise, or do you feel something spiritual?”

This is my favorite question because it’s often the one people have the most misconceptions about. I’ve had some people comment, “So what, you see an apparition and talk to it?”

Ha. If only I could be that powerful.

There are no apparitions for me. There is no divine shining light that beams down from the heavens and christens me with her voice.

It’s much more pedestrian than that. 99% of the time, I “receive” my guidance by communicating with her in the ways I’ve described. With automatic writing, with using cards to have a conversation or very rarely, doing guided visualizations and meditation.

The other 1% of the time, her guidance shows up in synchronicity. It took me a long time as a “mystical skeptic” to understand that it was her… to recognize that 3 or 4 seemingly unrelated things actually coalesce into guidance or wisdom.

And I can tell you that every time I recognize something that has Agatha’s spirit all over it — I DO have a spiritual experience. I feel incredibly grateful and honored that I am open-minded and open-hearted enough to receive the gifts that I perhaps wouldn’t of, if I didn’t choose to believe.

“What would you say to someone who finds the concept of a spirit guide too woo-woo or out there?”

I come across that “someone” more often than I don’t! And this is what I usually tell them:

“You do you, boo.”

Just kidding, kind of.

Here’s the truth — if you find the idea of spirit guides too woo-woo for you, then great, you don’t have to have one!

If you think having a writing spirit guide (or any spirit guide) is bullshit, then that’s fine. I don’t have any desire or need to convince you because I’m strong in my belief and relationship with mine.

There are often two brands of “someones” that ask me this question.

• The first is a skeptic of all things spiritual. And here’s the thing — you cannot force or change someone’s worldview if they do not have a kernel of belief within themselves. So it doesn’t matter what I say or how I talk about my experiences, they will never “believe” until it touches them.

• The second is usually someone who belongs to a branch of organized religion. But then, when I ask them how talking to Agatha is any different than the prayers and conversations they have with their God — they can’t answer. Because the truth is — there’s not much of a difference.

We come to these ideas of “something bigger to us” through different backgrounds, culture, and conditioning. But at the end of the day — it’s really all the same. We speak to the “things” that fill us with hope. We ask for help from things that are beyond us and our understanding of the world as we know it. We reach out to feel safe and loved.

Spirit is the greatest equalizer I’ve ever known. It transcends all the stupid human nature behaviors we play out in our lives and gets right to the soul of us. It doesn’t discriminate or deny anyone access. It reminds us we are all but a speck in the vast universe.

My chapter “To Agatha, With Love” explains my introduction to Agatha and working with her and then I share a few steps on how to find your own guide. It’s a beautiful love letter to Agatha, but also to the power of what it means to co-create with something that is beyond your understanding or comprehension.

The entire book is a love letter about how we forget how magical and special we are as human beings. It’s about how we can reclaim some of those forgotten parts of ourselves and piece them back together again. Because that’s the true alchemy of surviving life.

It’s a very special book to me.

I’m also going to sweeten the deal for anyone interested in purchasing a signed paperback — free access to my wildly popular “Connecting with Writing Spirit Guides” workshop.